The art of the silent fart- By the Rude Fairy
A friend once asked me, this is word,
about the fart that can’t be heard.
A knowing nod, I gave to him,
And then my know-how did begin.
I began slowly at the start,
Explaining dangers of ‘the shart’.
To pull it off, and to save face,
You must understand, it’s not a race.
Slow and steady, don’t enhance,
And be sure to avoid white pants.
And of course it comes as no surprise,
You will get better with excercise.
If you can 6 times a week,
Clench and hold, each bum cheek.
Now you’ve got a nice strong bum,
The art of seepage will naturally come.
So when you get that terrible urge,
You now will be able to comfortably purge.
No-one will know, who cut the cheese
And left them all falling to their knees.
But if at all, you can’t pull it off,
Just remember the faithfull fart-cough!
